Good luck and God bless, Sherman. Also, an introduction to me and this internet diary.

Well, Sherman, good luck in the big time with Hillary. We're all wishing you luck you back here.

Sherman did a nice job introducing me. For those that missed it, my name is Chick Cavalcanti, and I was 3rd Ward councilman from 1975 to 1979. I've been asked by Mayor Underdahl to fulfill this role once again, a charge I enthusiastically accepted.

As far as whether I plan on continuing to keep writing in this internet diary, I don't know yet. That Marisha they assigned me thinks it would be a good idea, but I'm still not totally sure how it all works. The guys at my bar, Chick's, on Stanton Avenue, talked about it once in awhile and I was never totally clear what he was trying to accomplish with it. But we'll keep it going for the time being and try to make it relevant. I asked the guys at the bar, some of my steady guys like Hank and Steve, if they read any online diaries. They sent me emails with a couple suggestions, but I looked at them and thought they were junk. I don't know how those guys got so damn conservative. Used to be solid, lunch-pail liberal union guys back in my day.

I asked that Marisha they assigned me what she thought I should write in the diary for today, and she had a few ideas, a lot of which were sort of good. I might just let write it if she wants to. She seems to be pretty hip to this stuff. Sherman was always having her write about rock bands, which seems like sort of a waste of a pretty sharp mind. I don't know what the hell is so interesting about rock bands. Do people write a lot about rock bands on these diaries? I guess I'll have to look at a few and see what's going on with them. If you know of any good ones, you can send them. But that Marisha they assigned me is pretty sharp.

I asked my grandkids Skippy, Charlie III and Madison what I ought to put in the diary and they sent me a bunch of photographs of talking cats. I don't really know how to get them out of the email, but they sure sent a bunch of them. I guess I could describe them instead of putting them up here. There's this cat, and he's looking at his feet because he's on his back, and he's saying "oh hey, are you my feet?" except it's all misspelled. So I guess the cat is supposed to be trying to speak cat language or something. I guess I don't get it.

Well, good luck out there. We'll talk soon.

A bittersweet day!

Today I have some very, very bittersweet news for all of you, my faithful readers.

Effective immediately, I am resigning my position as your councilman representing the 3rd Ward in order to take a position in Hillary Clinton's 2008 campaign for President.

Hillary and Hillary's campaign organization have asked me to join her Youth Are Our Future Now Hillary '08 Youth Advisory Subcommittee as co-chairman, and it is an honor I am deeply grateful to accept.

It's something I am reluctant to do. I am taking a $20,000 cut in pay, but how can you put a price on our future? Is getting the vote of just one more on-the-fence urban designer worth $20,000? Building a better future for the children of this nation by securing the support of a noise-rock band? Or an independent coffee shop? Or the clientele of a cult film video rental store that the other guys might have overlooked? I say yes, it is worth $20,000. It's worth more.

I love working with youth, and anyone that knows this neighborhood I have represented was made great by the youthful energy of its many late-teens, twentysomethings and very early non-homeowner thirtysomethings. These were the guys and gals that made us the envy of every non-Brooklyn, non-Bay Area urban neighborhood in America -- and we were even catching up with them, I know it. It's these talented, insightful, hard-working young folks that will decide who our next president will be, and it is my task to help them make the right decision. And the right decision is Hillary Clinton. She's not as young as her main rival, but she's got that "moxie" that I've seen in other great young leaders, and I'm so excited to help get the message out about her.

It's a time of transition here in the Heights. My assistant Marisha, too, is going through some professional changes. I would love her to come with me and work with on Hillary's campaign, but her future lies elsewhere -- in fact, not even in this country! She's taking a position in London this spring as a publicist for

My position will be filled by Mayor Underdahl's appointee, a man who is himself no stranger to the world of local politics, former Democratic 3rd Ward Councilman Charlie "Chick" Cavalcanti, Sr. As many of you recall, Chick served in this post from 1975 to 1979 before going on to also serve on the city's Recession Czar from 1980 until 1983, and then going into the private sector throughout the 1980s and 1990s (you may recall the short-lived 1985 CBS sitcom based loosely on his exploits as a tavern-keeper and former local politician, C'mere A Minute). He has come out of retirement to fill this position, and is excited about serving until a special election is called later this year. Here's hoping he brings the most interesting parts of the spirit of the old 1970s Armitage Heights to our modern-day neighborhood! Of course, Councilman Cavalcanti will be welcome to continue this blog as he sees fit. It is my hope that he does.

I will be maintaining a new blog called The Kids Are All Hillary!, which you'll be able to find at http://www.hillaryclinton.com/blogs/thekids. I hope to see some of you there -- and then in Washington in 2009!

So with my best wishes to all of you, I remain yours in service,

Our one year anniversary!

One year ago today, I sat down at my computer in my office at City Hall downtown and typed out the very first entry of this blog, the Armitage Heights Clarion. As I said then, my goal was to post "information about things happening around the neighborhood, news for residents and business owners, updates from city council meetings, and maybe even a few tips about life around the city!"

And so I have! What a year! Who could have imagined then what a wild -- and productive -- year the neighborhood would have?

Looking back, it's hard to believe so much happened in the space of a year, both positive and non-positive. There were the Winter Parade disturbances last year, the troubling emergence of the Kaos Krew as a major force on the international art scene, the unfortunate dysenteric death of handgun activist Marla Manda Johanssen (and brouhaha over her proposed memorial), the demisesquecentennial of the Zeppelin District, my assault and subsequent hospitalization at the hands of a fellow councilperson, my abbreviated U2-themed vacation to Ireland, kidnapping and brief career in the illegal underground 1984 Boston Celtics Dubai hostage basketball league , my assistant Marisha's housesitting woes with Mitt Romney's freeloading kids followed by his outrageous denunciation of Marisha, the meteoric rise of indie-rock superstars the October Revolutionists, my court-mandated re-election over Ms. Johnanssen's son Barry and a host of challengers, and of course, the tragic and still-shocking death of unlicensed non-Muslim cleric the Ayatollah Martin Wisniewski. And too many other neighorhood events and news tidbits to count!

Needless to say, it's been a wonderful year writing this blog for everyone. I hope to be around to serve the people the 3rd Ward for many years to come, and I hope you will continue to find the Clarion a useful, reliable and fun source of inform about this great neighborhood. It's definitely "in ur computer, conveyin ur nayborhood pride," as those great internet cats might say.

CNN's "1,000 Best Neighborhoods of All Time": we've got three!

A typical rickets-free Kendall Park residence in 1902 -- the kind that dazzled CNN!

CNN has recently published its list of the 1,000 Best Neighborhoods Of All Time. And who should be appear on the list three times? Our very own Armitage Heights!

Armitage Heights (2007), Armitage Heights (1970) and Kendall Park (1902) were all picked by a panel of experts from a list of hundreds of thousands of neighborhoods throughout the entirety of world history, based on livability, safety, cost of living, infrastructure and cultural amenities -- and we didn't do too badly at all! Present-day Armitage Heights ranked at a respectable #688, right in front of Mount Auburn/Brattle Street in Cambridge, Massachusetts (1770), and right behind the E-Ninnu Temple District in Lagash, Sumer (2050 BCE). Between the Tories of Cambridge and the high priests of Sumeria, this is pretty outstanding company! The panel cited our "great public transit, historic architecture, and thrilling cultural scene" as distinguishing traits. We have the added distinction of being the only neighborhood in the state to make the list.

Kendall Park (1902) fared even better, placing all the way up at #159! The committee was wowed by the neighborhood's "legendary central square" (young people might be scratching their heads as to where exactly this is located -- it's now the site of the equally legendary Ellison Cooper Volberg Public Housing Towers) and "beautiful Italianate buildings." The panel also noted that "the unusually low instances of influenza, rickets and lockjaw in the area's natives made this the late autumn getaway destination for well-to-do vacationers from all over early-20th Century America." It's worth pointing out the Kendall Park still retains very low instances of rickets, and a great many of the beautiful brick row houses are still standing!

The 1970 Armitage Heights held up the end of the list at #933, and the article noted that "despite the radical criminality, high unemployment and decaying infrastructure of the time, there were many outstanding hippie sculpture parks and an attractive air of danger-tinged mod-ish free-spiritedness to the place, best captured in Kimball Burin's well-known 1972 non-fiction book Moloch of Stanton Ave."

The best neighborhood of all time, of course, was voted XIe arrondissement of Paris (1911), with the Upper East Side of New York City (1961) running a close second.

Next year, let's see if we can displace the Sumerians next year and inch up closer to the top!

Let's have a pleasant, orderly court-ordered re-vote.

Supporters of Republican candidate Barry G. Johannsen and Green candidate Andrea Gilanshah tussle in an anti-Dr. Thomas Jefferson Harding protest in Armitage Square on Sunday.

Well, as I am sure you've heard, last week's election had a few mishaps -- the presence of robotic Libertarian pro-Ron Paul spambots in the voting machine electronic grid, the illegal candidacy of fugitive Viet Cong ex-patriate Dr. Thomas Jefferson, and the farcical, one-note candidacy of local writer, activist and jerk Kimball F. Burin.

The entire slate of candidates, in fact, filed for a court injunction to have last Wednesday's election results nullified -- a move that the 10th Circuit court upheld in a ruling early this morning.

Reublican Party candidate Barry G. Johannsen objected on the grounds that the illegal presence of Ron Paul on the ballot drew Republican votes from him. He was also infuriated by the illegal presence on the ballot of Dr. Harding, whom he still fiercly maintains is directly responsible for the death of his mother, Marla Manda Johannsen during her recent, ill-advised bounty-hunting journey to Vietnam. He also vowed to follow in his mother's footsteps to Vietnam to find and extradite Dr. Harding should he not win the re-vote.

Green Party candidate Andrea Gilanshah also objected to the presence of Dr. Harding, and believe he may have drawn away valuable votes from the 50 or so old Jewish socialists still living in pockets of Armitage Hill that might have made for a more narrow margin.

Kimball F. Burin, running under the made-up banner of the "Anti-Bedwetters Democratic Union," made some wildly unfounded accusations to the Free-Press last week to the effect that his campaign was personally sabotaged by myself and my assistant Marisha, and also claimed to have photos of the two of us dressed in (his words) "bondage gear" sneaking around his headquarters on Stanton Avenue which he will post to his website this week. This is too ridiculous to even contemplate responding to seriously.

Ron Paul's presidential campaign released a statement late last week denying any responsibility for any "spambots." However, the shadowy Facebook group "HAXX0RZ 4 RON PAUL WINING EVERY ELECTION!!!11!!!" may have played some role in the strong spambot-aided showing by Rep. Paul. An investigation is underway. Libertarian spambots have no place in our local elections.

The re-vote will be held tomorrow, November 13. For information about where to vote, please contatct the Pierce County Board of Elections at (436) 774-VOTE, or visit their website at http://elections.pierce.mish.hu.us/.

Election results!

Well, the hard work is all over, and I want to thank everyone that voted for me in yesterday's election. You'll note I didn't mention much about the election on my blog here, but I want very much to keep politics out of here, and focus on the things that transcend politics -- non-partisan issues like my recent Christmas Island Economic Sustainability Plan. The sorts of things we can all agree on as a neighborhood, regardless of party affiliation.

Nonetheless, here are the results of the 3rd Ward city council election, as certified by the Herald-Star and KWHA 5 television.

All of my opponents are honorable, intelligent men and women, and I am proud to have had such distinguished opponents in this race. When I say this, however, I do not include novelist and gadabout Kimball Burin, whose dull, endless tirades against me (under the auspices of a fictitious, inaccruately-named and generally insulting "Anti-Bedwetter's Democratic Union") are an embarrassment to his otherwise sterling legacy of hard-hitting drunken New Journalism. Nor do I include fugitive malcontent Dr. Thomas Jefferson Harding, who remains a dangerous, crazed idealogue that we are still working very hard to extradite and should probably not be permitted to appear on a ballot legally -- the fact that he ran in absentia representing the Vietnamese Communist Party is pure spite, and also probably not legal.

Ron Paul is a good man, too, I suppose, if you're into his sort of thing (I have endorsed Bill Richardson myself!). Apparently, though, he only earned half a percentage point owing to the influence of overzealous Libertarian computer spambots that somehow worked their way onto the electronic grid. I will probably need to appoint a commission to look into that.

I invite all citizens of the 3rd Ward to join me in the hard work that remains to be done in the next five years -- excepting, of course, members of the Vietnamese Communist Party and the Anti-Bedwetter's Democratic Union.


Sherman LARSON
(Democrat)
54%


Barry G. JOHANNSEN
(Republican)
35%


Andrea GILANSHAH
(Green)
6%


Kimball F. BURIN
(Anti-Bedwetters Democratic Union)
3%


Bronwynn Hyperioum EISENBERG
(Wiccan Socialist)
1%


Dr. Thomas Jefferson HARDING
(Đang Cong san Viet Nam)
0.5% (in absentia)


Ron PAUL
(Republican Misc.)
0.5%

"Scary" Halloween costumes!

I'd like to take a moment to acknowledge the high volume of wacky Halloween costume pictures that we've gotten emailed to us here in the office -- it seems like an awful lot of you were dressing up as me this year for Fright Night festivities! Below are some of the best ones! My pick for winner is little Madison Monaghan-Gibney of Kendall Park below! My assistant Marisha says the best resemblance is Adam Beyersdorf of Wihinapa (with his "hippie" wife Allison below).




Well done, everyone!

Marisha thought that some of these photos were just people in suits after work, but it's clear to me from the hair coloring and posture that they're "doing Sherman." I feel proud to be a part of people's lives in this way.

For obvious reasons, I chose not to include any photos of "me" that involved blood, Monopoly money, arrow-through-the-head props, East German commandant uniforms, marijuana references, shredded-up copies of the U.S. Constitution and/or all of these items at once (very clever, Bud Hobday of Armitage Hill).